New Camera

Even though our anniversary is not until next Friday, Matt and I decided a couple of weeks ago to splurge and get a new camera. We are calling it our anniversary present to each other. It is a Nikon D60 and we love it! We feel like real photographers when using it and take a gazillion pictures with it. And now, here's some proof of our new photography skills:

Dugan Look-alike Meter

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Friday's mail

Matt is home sick today. Parker officially has bronchiolitis, and Matt was lucky enough to catch it from him. Thankfully, it only resulted in a yucky cold for Matt.

All that to say, though, is that we were both home when the mail arrived. Matt went out to get it and brought in a free sample of formula from Enfamil. I just thought it was another offer since Parker's arrival. However, after looking more closely, Matt realized that it was Enfamil Next Step for "our toddler." And then it hit me...we got this free formula because if we had not miscarried, our first baby would almost be one year old.

Wow.

Matt and I were both a little shell-shocked when it hit us. I cannot, for the life of me, imagine my life any other way. But there was a time when I dreamed that it could be different. That we hadn't miscarried. That we had a baby in our arms last June.

But then I look at Parker and know that if there had been no miscarriage, there would have been no Parker. Actually, there probably would have been a Parker, but not this Parker. Not this wonderful, sweet, precious Parker that we are so blessed to have in our life.

I am thankful for God's plan for my life. And I'm thankful for this small reminder of it today. That even when it doesn't make sense, or doesn't seem fair, or fun, or exciting, that He is in control. And I can rest in that.

Orange for Stellan

Parker and I are sporting some orange today to show our support of Stellan as he undergoes heart surgery. Check it all out at www.mycharmingkids.net.

Monday Ramblings

So, it's Monday, and I am at home because there is a congested little boy lying on the couch next to me. I know I am home 3 days a week, but it feels different because I should be at work today. And there is definitely stuff to do as summer is quickly approaching.

Parker is super congested and coughing a ton. I hate seeing my baby sick. This morning, when Matt was feeding him at 6:00, Parker was having an awful time eating. We were only able to get about 2.5 ounces in him, and then he threw it all up. He was hungry, but just couldn't keep any breastmilk/formula down. I called into the nurse at the hospital and after suggesting everything we had done/were doing, she told us to go into the doctor. So, off to the doctor Parker and I went. Fortunately, the congestion is all in his head and not in his lungs. But the doctor said it would probably take about a week for this to play out. Ugh.

In good news, though, Matt and I are having a fun time planning for our fifth anniversary. We are looking forward to Friday, May 15th, when we will spend the night in a hotel in Austin while my parents watch the Park-man. We were able to book the Hyatt Regency on Town Lake in downtown off of Priceline. I was really nervous bidding for a hotel without knowing which one we would get, but I am really excited about the Hyatt! And it's funny because Matt and I are talking about all the things we want to do that night/next day and the list is getting quite long. Right now: a movie, clothes shopping for our trimmer figures, couples massage, and lots of good food! :)

OK - there. Another blog this month! I think I didn't blog as much because I wanted each blog to be meaningful and purposeful, not just a lot of random stuff about our everyday life. But if I wait for that, then we could be waiting a long time (as witnessed before).

Well...

Well...looks like I really stink at this whole blog thing. I kept on putting off updating my blog because there was TOO much to say. Does that even make sense? Oh well. I'm going to ignore the urge to write a novel about these past two months, and just try to be better about updating as things happen. We shall see.

It is funny to read my last post over two months ago. I was anticipating the birth of this little boy, but I had no idea who he was. And now he is laying here on the couch with me and I can't believe that he was the one in my belly for over 9 months. I knew that motherhood would be new and exciting and scary and all that fun stuff. But, then again, did I really understand how absolutely life-changing the birth of Parker Allen Dugan would be? No.

The first two weeks of Parker's life I was beyond overwhelmed. And, honestly, there were times when I thought, "What in the world have I gotten myself into?" But now I can't remember life without him and am thankful for that. He is the happiest, sweetest, most laid-back baby. I am so excited to see what each new day brings with this little boy.

And, now, a super precious picture of Parker on Easter Sunday.

Overdue

It is a little bit of a bummer to get onto my blog and see the ticker in the top righthand corner that says that I am 40 weeks and 4 days pregnant. But, If I'm really being honest, I always felt that I would probably be late. I mean, my mom was 3 1/2 weeks late with my brother, and she would probably be pregnant with him still to this day if she hadn't finally demanded a c-section. :)

If Parker doesn't come on his own, then I will go into the hospital this Thursday night (Feb. 12th) at 10 pm. They will start me on Cervadil to soften my cervix and my doctor told me that I could just sleep that night at the hospital. Are you kidding me? Does he really think any sleeping will be going on that night? I mean, really. Except, I know Matt will be fine and snoring within 5 minutes. Then, early this Friday morning they will start giving me Pitocin in my IV to kickstart labor. So...It is looking more and more like Parker will be my little Friday the 13th baby.

The gravity of it all is starting to hit me and I'm trying to stay calm. I mean, there are SO many things that I am scared and unsure about. First, of course, is labor. But, after that, will he be healthy? Will I be able to breastfeed? Will I ever sleep again? (I tend to need about 8 hours a night) How will this change mine and Matt's relationship? So many things that are running around in my head.

At the very same time, I get so emotional just thinking of the journey that Matt and I have taken to get to this point. And the miracle that God created through childbirth. I cannot comprehend how someone could question the existence of God, especially when thinking about every single part of childbirth. From conception to that very first breath, and all of the tiny details in between. I am SO thankful that I have been able to experience this miracle.